Butt Out

I finally had another entry here after a long hiatus from blogging.
Not that I have nothing to share ,
but more of finding a worthwhile purpose why bother blogging.
The inspiration came from my sister from Singapore, Ate Tatee,
who told me today she gets to know me more through this blog.
Ate, thanks for the sweet push. Love you!

I have a confession to make...
I'm smoking steadily for almost two years now.
I took it as a stress reliever from the pressures of med school.
To keep me awake and focused
while studying in the wee hours of the morning.
It did serve its purpose
but I developed a habit that caused more problems.
I never knew it can become an urge too good to let it pass.
After sometime, I found myself hooked into it.
I'd light at any time of the day,
especially during breaks and after meals.
It became a social thing for me too,
when at parties and when with friends.
Then came a point when I thought:
"Well hey, we all have our struggles, this is mine."
So I just did my own thing,
thinking that it's okay to show I'm human.
But in the back of my mind, I know it's wrong.
And I should stop it before this compulsion corrupts my being.

Then I started dreaming.
I finally found strength and reason to give it up.
I listed today 18 compelling dreams, my reasons to quit smoking now.

1. I want to be healthy. Be in the best shape all the time.
2. I want to be free from any illness that would take away my body, my relationships, my passions, my resources

3. I want to love my future wife for the longest possible time
4. So we can travel and see the world as we grow old, to take her out to dates more often
5. So I can take care of her as we grow old

6.I want to be there for my family for the longest time
7. So I can spend time with my children
8.So I can fully provide for their needs and have extra for life's simple pleasures
9. So I can watch them grow up and have a family on their own
10. So I can have the grandest time with my grandchildren

11. I want to be able to dedicate more time for my passions
12. So I can serve God more through music, and community
13. So my witnessing can have more meaning.
14. So I can write more songs and record them into albums
15.To go around the world playing music for the Lord

16.I want to be a great doctor who practices what I preach
17. To help others quit smoking too
18. So I can take care of more people, and be a channel of healing

My list doesn't end here.
I plan to write more everyday.
I'm butting out because I decide to.
And I'm going to make this decision every single day.
I think a lot of people get hooked into this self-destructing habit
because it is a cheap and readily available form of relief and company.
But this is temporary.
Fleeting in a matter of minutes.

I now decide to look forward to things that would lead to true happiness and companionship.
I start today.

Dearest Lord, you are a God who make all things new.
Help me with this decision, guide its progress,
and bring it into completion.
Amen.

Didoy

Happy Thought

This week has been hellish in Med school
but nevertheless, it's almost over.
And I'm happy I survived and I still have a very good disposition.
If I would remember,
I almost drowned myself within a 'quicksand' for some time.
The more I struggled, the more I put myself in a downward spiral.
But then again, when the Lord moves,
He would take you out of the pit,
appoint and anoint you to places you never imagined to be in.
He will fill you with so much love so that it overflows;
so much that you have to give it away.

Here's my secret why I'm able to keep the toxicity out of my mind.
Happy thoughts.
It drives away the fear, and it belittles the problems that beset you.
And it allows you to fly. (Is that you Peter pan?!)


My immediate happy thought for the week is my band's concert this Saturday
in the cool and happy place: Baguio!
The Lord has blessed us with another territory to spread His love.
Humbled and thankful, we go there ready to fire up the people
and to usher them to the life-changing presence of God.

Friends, happy thoughts are there to remind us
that we have a happy God.
And He wants us to be happy as well.
No happy thoughts?
Look through the mirror and you will see.
You are the number one happy thought of God.
Because you are His child,
and He's happy with His most beautiful creation, YOU.

Next week will be our Shifting Exams.
Lord, thank you for nourishing me,
and giving me the inspiration that I need to carry on.

Didoy

I Celebrated Mass Today -- In Latin

As promised, I pledged to my mom today
that I'll be her driver this morning.
Destination: San Beda Alabang Chapel
to attend a Latin Mass with her kumares.
Since they are currently forming a Latin choir for ladies,
they wanted to observe how the mass is celebrated
and to listen to the all men's choir as well.
Uh-oh. This is gonna be fun. Haha.

We arrived 845am, early for the mass at 930am.
Not too excited huh?
The chapel was spacious, air conditioned,
austere yet magnificent.
The small congregation gathered is mostly composed of
older women wearing white or black veils.
I was surprised to see that the altar setup
was for the priest with his back turned away from the congregation.
Wow. Never heard of something like this since Vatican II.
Mama told me that the Latin Mass
was being revived by instructions of the Pope.

The Gregorian chant of the all men's Latin choir
signaled the start of the high mass.
Amazing! They were majestic throughout the mass.
I felt like I was in a monastery, back to the olden times.
I don't understand the lyrics, but the well practiced voicing
and sheer musicality was enough to give me goosebumps.
From the prayers to the readings,
almost the whole mass was sung in Latin.
Good thing the sermon was in English.
It was also notable to see 13 altar boys assisiting in the mass.
So many!
They all played an active role in the celebration.
Though the mass took 90 minutes, I didn't get bored
because my curiosity was suddenly up.
My senses were all observing because for the first time,
I get to witness and participate in a Eucharistic celebration
that was not practiced for the last 40 years.
Good thing there were Missals distributed,
so that we could read Latin and join in reciting the prayers.
I was busy looking through the translation of the prayers,
from left (Latin) to right (English) of the missal
just to understand the mass.
I had a hard time trying to keep up with the words.
And there were a lot of moments when I have no idea
of what part of the mass we are in.But after my experience today, I'd say it's worth the interest.
It was great and very memorable.
And if opportunity comes next time, I'd say yes again.
I experienced the Eucharist in serenity and and peace.
It moved me into silent prayer and deep reflection
that I haven't done for a long time.
And I realized, this was just what I needed.
Plus, I was able to express my love to Mom.
She too shared her feelings and stories to me.
The Lord led me to Him in a new majestic way today.
I'm in awe.
Thank you Lord.

-Didoy

A Student's Prayer

Today is the Feast of St. Thomas Aquinas, our university's saint,
-A Doctor of the Church and the patron saint
of scholars and students.

Let me just share to you a beautiful prayer I learned here in my university.
This is believed to be a prayer of St. Thomas himself before studying.
This is for all the students, teachers,
and professionals who continue with their education.
May we all never tire of learning and discovering new things
in service of man and for the glory of God.

Lord Jesus Christ,
source of light and wisdom;

give me a keen sense of understanding,

a retentive memory,

and the ability to grasp things correctly.

Grant me the grace to be active in my dispositions,

and be able to express myself

with thoroughness and clarity.

Be with me at the start of my study,

guide its progress and bring it into completion.

This I ask through Christ our Lord,

Amen.

-Didoy

Crossroad.

Oh how I love it when it's New Year!

It's exciting to think about what can happen this coming 365 days.

My friends, let me share to you two phrases of inspiration

that struck me as I was reflecting for the coming year.

We are approaching another crossroad in our lives -- a new year.

Stop. Look. Listen.

Stop

Take time to reflect. To think about the future.

Stop complaining. It's no use.

Stop the timidity.
Stop being in the middle. Have a cause.
Stop with the destructive habits. It will get you nowhere.
Stop being a mess.

You may have hundreds of reasons why, but still its a mess.

Stop the unnecessary anxiety. This year is yours.

Look

Look back and learn.

Look forward and leave the shit behind.

Look for ways for improvement.

You would be more of a person this year.
Look more into your blessings.
If you would give attention to them, you would be happy.
Look more into the eyes of your loved one.

Look up. Think. Pray. Dream.

Listen

Listen to God who gives direction.

Listen to the changing times.

Listen to your parents and everything will be well.

Listen to a friend who needs help.

Listen to the belittled people.

Listen to your body, try not to abuse it.

Listen to your heart more often.

Go. Grow. Glow.

Go

Go where you want to go.

A life full of regrets is a tragedy.

Go to wise people and seek advice.
Go out of your comfort zone once in a while.
Go and find a solution to your porblem.
Go out and make new friends.

Go for a vacation and see the beauty of God's creation.

Go tripping with family and friends.

Go for a healthy body. Exercise. Get into sports..

Grow

Have a sense of growth.

Expand your territories.

Learn new skills.

Find a mentor.

Develop your passions.

Get better than the year before.

Challenge yourself.

Achieve.

Claim it.

Glow

Be at peace.

Do your best at school or work.

Gagawin mo na lang, galingan at gandahan mo na.

If today, you are picking up the grapes,
tomorrow you will be the drinking wine.

Have faith. And you will move mountains.

Enjoy life. It's too short to grumble about it.

Take it easy. Find grace under pressure.

Be a light to other people's darkness.

Invite someone to Church.

And make them feel 'pwede pala mabuhay ng ganito.'

Its simple. You've heard these before.

But all of us needs to be reminded sometimes right?

This year is a fresh start. Go on and truly live.

Thank you Lord for your faithfulness in 2008.
And I thank you for assuring me for 2009.

Didoy

'Roadtrip'

This Christmas, Mayi and I made a radical decision.
Instead of giving gifts to our dear loved ones,
we reserved our simple treasures
and planned to give it to the poor in the streets.
We felt the Lord leading us to do this, so we obeyed.
We initially planned to clothe the poor since we wanted to do
something new, a gift that would last longer than a meal.
So we ordered 100+ customly printed shirts
with our message for our dear bros and sis in the streets:
"Ikaw at ako, mahal ng Diyos".

We knew that the Lord blessed our initiative because when people
learned about this, donations started pouring in.
So instead of just clothing the poor, we were able to feed them.
I would like to take this opportunity to thank all those who shared
what they had, their time and treasure,
to make this activity a success.
The Lord will surely give you back more than you gave.

On Christmas Eve we drove around
Makati and Manila streets on a 'Roadtrip'.
With Mayi and I are our dear friends Jem and Christine
who volunteered to help us in the gift-giving.
Our rally point was in Sanctuario de San Antonio at 8am.
We started with a prayer of thanksgiving
for the overflowing blessings
that gave us the grace to give.
When the backdoor of the Revo was opened,
we were amused to see that there were a lot of people
running from several directions already expecting us.
It was funny because even some average passersby
also lined up for the goodies.
"Just give it all," I said to myself.

Afterwards, we drove through the following areas:
Ayala Ave., Kamagong Area, Osmeña Highway, Quirino Ave.,
Nagtahan, UST Area, Quiapo, Lawton, Roxas Blvd.,
CCP Area, Buendia Ave.

At the end of the trip, sweaty, smelly and tired,
we treated ourselves to lunch in Tokyo Tokyo.
Nagutom din, kaya rice all you can. Haha.

We met a lot of our brothers and sisters in the streets.
And we felt that the Lord was happily with us.
We experienced again a miracle,the gifts were multipied.
There was lot more to give than we estimated.
Though our hands were giving, our hearts were full.
I loved the roadtrip because it proved
that a random act of kindness from a stranger is possible.
It was a priceless gift to see them with their genuine smiles.

By the way, we also gave to the people who go unnoticed
like the security guards, the Pulis Oysters who clean up our roads,
and the 'takatak' boys (vendors who do business near stoplights).

During the trip, there were moments of silence in the van
because we were all touched with what was going on.
We all went home to our families to spend the rest of the day.
With the fullness of heart after the roadtrip,
I must say I was able to sincerely feel the joy of giving.
That it's really better to give than to receive.
In fact, once you fully give, you won't think of receiving anymore.
At the end of the day,
I presented this simple offering as a welcoming gift
to the only one whom we need to receive in life, our dear Jesus.

Oh, it was a perfect day.
Thank you Lord.

-Didoy

My Christmas List

I've been struggling with silence for the past two weeks.
Maybe it's comes with the holiday season.
I observed that people are just laid back during this time of the year.
I myself have been busy having fun,
and I've not been taking down notes.
Or maybe I'm just lazy enough to write. Haha.
My fingers lost fire because the weather's cold and
it's so inviting just to snooze around.
Anyway it's Christmas break already!
Haha. Yahoo!

Here I am, writing again because I feel the need to.
I'm sharing to you my Christmas break to-do list.
Why did I bother to post it?
Because laying it down means to me
that I bravely give you my word to fulfill the list.
This is new to me,
I've never been this bold to broadcast my plans ahead.
But this is my way of helping myself. Haha.
It's my challenge to self-discipline actually.
In my list, some are already checked out,
and I plan to finish the list
before coming back to school on Jan. 5.
In the list, you'll find some serious stuff, and some silly stuff as well.
I hope you might find some meaning into my scribbles.


Things to do on Christmas break 2008:

Everyday:
-Wake up early.
-Read the bible.
-Exercise.
-Have breakfast with Mom.
-Write.
-Dream.
-Relax.
-Talk with someone.
-Read.

In my quiet time:
-Rest and reflect in His presence.
-Plan for the coming year. Make resolutions.
-Organize the written plans for YLSS 28.

Family:
-Stay at home most of the time.
-Fetch Ate Tatee on Dec. 24, 4:05am, Cebu Pac flight from Singapore.
-Play Dota with Gerard.
-Read with Iday.
-Play with Cheenoe.
-Yes to any family activity.

With Mayi:
-Gift giving to the streets. (will blog on this after the activity)
-Christmas date.
-Watch a movie.
-Shopping.
-Coffee date.

Cell group:
-Meet. If unavailable, have a schedule for next meeting.
-Direction from Jan
-Assign prayer leader

Planned and confirmed Parties:
-Subsction C2 KTV party
-Carlof and Jan White party
-BLDYouth's Kalikimaka Luau
-FCH's Stockholder's Party
Still waiting for confirmations for other reunions.

Play and practice:
-Piano
-Guitar
-Basketball with Kuya Aboy and Seton friends

Read:
-Prayer of Jabez (3rd time)
-Deliverance from Evil Spirits
(found this interesting old book in our mini-library at home)
-New book (Still undecided)

Update:
-Blog
-Friendster

Clean and Fix:
-My study table
-Closet
-Piano tuning at home

Watch:
-Downloaded movies (5)
-Love Actually
-Finally finish House Season 4

I would've wanted to write more.
But I'd like to keep it attainable given the time I have.
Also, I choose to open myself to the surprises from the Lord.
I'm sure there is. God loves surprises.

Friends, do you want to have a meaningful time this holiday season?
Make plans. Write it down. And do it.
In life, nothing beats a dreamer who follows his dreams.
Aside from His presence in our lives,
God has given us a precious gift --- Time.
Spend it wisely, because most are at poverty on this nowadays.
Have a quiet time alone with God. Be thankful.
Be with your family.
Be with the people who give meaning to your life.
Give back all the blessings you received during the year.
Prepare for the coming year.
Spend time to improve yourself.
Revisit your forgotten talents, add fire to your passions.
There are a lot of things that can add meaning to your Christmas season.
Just remember to have a great time in doing it all.

Wishing you a wonderful and a meaningful Christmas,
-Didoy